| 29 Years old and …. |
| Well my son is now totally healed and I am earning a substantial salary monthly! |
| Everything turned out just fine :-) |
| All my friend s are so rebellious .. Having fun, drinking, motorcycles, loud music, fast cars and just enjoying life. |
| Doing modelling, beauty competitions … life is great! |
| All of a sudden my heart starts beating faster that it can handle! I feels as if I am going to die!! I know |
| if this keeps on my heart is going to snap!! It cannot beat faster … I know … I have over dosed!! Oh God help!! |
| I see Satan walking towards me … His is coming to fetch me … I am going straight to hell .. He is wearing a black hood and his eyes are bloodshot red … |
| My heart is still going at 200 beats per minute … I am going to die!!! My heart is going to stop!!! It is going to snap! The muscles cannot keep up with this! |
| A voice like thunder enters my mind! I see a bible as big as the horizon … a thumb flipping it open |
| … the voice says thundering … THIS IS WHAT YOU LIVE ACCORDINGLY … FROM THE BEGINNING TO THE END!!! |
| I see a newspaper… I am on the front page .. My son and Mom and grandmother is on it as well … the heading: |
| MOM DIES OF OVERDOSE … SON STAYS ALONE BEHIND! |
| I AM DEAD! |
| No God!! Please deliver me from the evil one!! … |
| Immediately the palpitations stop! God saved me! |
| I must get back to Mom … living in Johannesburg is going to kill me! |
| ….. my
son is now 13 years old |
| With a shock I found out that he is on drugs! |
| …. Why? … why is he so rebellious? |
| …. For 7 years …. Up to the age of 20 … he is still on it … all his friends say he has issues …. |
| "Mom … I want my Dad" … I hear that more than once … "Mom where is my Dad!!!" |
| My heart breaks every time my sons asks me …. "I am so sorry Babes!!!" |
| He is
broken … searching for his Dad … Where can you find a man that you have not
had contact with for decades??? |
| The more
my son asks where is his Dad … the more I see how broken he is … of hurt … of
not having a Father in his life … |
| How could I ever think that I can be the Father and the Mother!!?? |
| God made
male and female for a reason …. Now I am learning all these things after I
have ruined my life and my sons life and … also my sons children's life … if things do not change drastically!!! |
| God help!! How can my sons find his Dad? |
| Please help my son God … he is broken … he needs a Father!! And he needs You Lord!!! |
| We have
been so lost our hole life Lord … so lost … and just because of one mistake I
made when I was young and I loved being rebellious!! |
| Now I
see what that rebellion did to my life, the man that I loved so much's life
and my precious son's Life … if only I listened to Mom and DAD!! |
| Help my God … Please help my Son God!!! Please God!!! Please!!!! |
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